Fields of Nozzles - Part 24

"right come on now, lets have a look" said joe, looking very worried indeed, "yes, let me just get my briefcase" said rob,
inside the office, everything had been strewn all over the floor, and all the furniture had been tipped over,
"i do hope nothing is missing" said emma, tearfull to say the least, "right lets have a look, see whats been taken" said joe in an important voice, we have to know why this was done, and if it was luke, why" "yes" agreed arthur, "we must find luke, and speak to him" " well for now we will have a sort through this lot, and tomorrow we will have to send a search party out to find him" said joe,
so emma went to bed, while the guys started looking through the mess, "interesting" wondered joe, "what" asked arthur,
"the plans for the farmhouse are missing, and the deeds for the pub" replied joe, "what would luke want with those i wonder"
said rob, stroking his chin, "maybe he wants to set up a rival nozzle farm" suggested arthur, "mm. maybe" said joe,
thinking hard, so when they had finished sorting through the office, it was time for a beer, "well it doesn't seem like anything else is missing" said joe, relieved.

so in the morning, joe broke the news to everyone, at breakfast, "so we will have to send out a search party, to try and find luke"
said joe, "yes i will be leader" added alion, "and i will be public relations officer, company psychologist and informations director"
added debbie, excitedly, "mm, yes whatever you say debbie" said joe pitifully, so when breakfast was finished and lots of tea had been had by all, it was time to clear up the wolf carcases, and start planting the new harvest, "now people" said joe, standing up and rubbing his hands together, "whos doing what" "well me, debbie, charlotte, jo c and tim are going to look fro luke" said alion,
"yeah and i'm going to open up the pub" added rob, "plus i need to get to a cash machine, and buy some salmon and trout"
"right ok, i will go start the harvest, louise come with me, and i will need 15 other people" said joe,
"everyone else, start clearing up the wolves" "right come on people" said matt, enthusiastically.

so many days passed, luke was nowhere to be found, the wolves were gone for good, the new harvest was ready to plant proper,
as soon as the right weather appeared, and emily was coming home in a few days, the final of the darts championship, was thus,
debbie and joe verses jo and rii, and rob had made peace with jess and tom, plus jess had finally given up smoking, after 9 years!!
so all was quite, louise was watching the weather like a hawk, joe was restless, thinking about luke, and those strange plans going missing, robyn and julia, kept going off to the barn? and carlos was missing emily, but bex was "comforting" him.

"well" said joe one day, at dinner, "i think we should have ntl telephone and internet axcess, installed" "oh what a good idea"
said jeni, "oh not ntl" said becca, "i hate those ntl people" "well i know they are a bit anal, but i have looked into it and they are the cheapest by far" replied joe, "so its settled i'm afraid" "oh ok" agreed becca, not sounding very convinced,
"anyway i will ring them tonight, and order it, for as soon as possible" "more tea anyone?" asked jo, holding the teapot,
"well i wouldn't say no" replied rob, "tea, toast, fag" he added, "indeed" added joe, "wheres bex, by the way" said robyn,
"i think she is feeling unwell" said julia p, "well i better see how she is" said carlos hastely, "just in case"
"whats up with them" said tom, "i dunno, but i don't like it" replied sarah ingham, "somethings up" she added,

so the next day, while everyone was having breakfast, emily rang and said she was coming home that very day!!
"good news everyone" said joe smiling, "emily is coming home today" "cool" said sophie, i hope her mother is ok"
"i hope my horse is ok too" added viki, "i have been missing blossom, he's my best horse" "thats a very gay name for a male horse,
isn't it?" asked james, "well i liked it" replied viki, "on another matter" interupted joe, "i rang ntl last night, and they are coming this afternoon" "cool" said reena, "i can't wait to have free internet axcess, i can buy old hospital jurnals, on auction sites"
"yes we ae all looking farward to it, now, louise says today is the day to start the planting, and we all have to help"
"yes that right" interupted louise, rudely, pulling down a weather chart, "by my calculations, it is the perfect day to plant,
and as i was saying earlier, my hand was right up there!!! i mean right up there!!!!" "ok ok, i was talking" said joe,
"oh yeah sorry" said louise, a little embarresed, "anyway, the point is, we need someone to stay at the house, and let in the ntl blokes, and answer any questions they might ask" "oh i'll do that" volunteered becca, "right ok, good, come on then people eat up,
there is work to do!" said joe gulping down his waffles.

so after breakfast, everyone went outside to start work, except becca who put on jerry springer, to watch "quorn stunted my growth, and ruined my life" outside emily was galloping down the track towards the farm, "hey here comes emily" said ingham excitedly,
"oh good" said joe, looking up from his work, "i hope all is well at home" so while viki went off to the stable, to prepare for blossoms
return, everyone got back to work, inside becca was still watching jerry springer, when there was a knock at the back door,
"oh good, that'll be ntl" she said smirking, "hello" said a man of slight stature, when becca opened the door,
"why come in" said becca, "tea?" she asked, "oh yes please" answered the man, "right" said becca picking up a meat clever,
"are you ready" she asked, leaping at the man, and hacking him to the ground, and proceeding to chop him up, starting with his head! so when all was finshed, the floor was awash with blood, and there was becca, standing there, breathing hard and dripping with blood, "now for the others" she said heading for the ntl van, parked outside!

"emily, hows things" called bex, as emily came into the courtyard, "my mother is feeling much better thankyou" replied emily jumping down from blossom, "good good" said bex, "wheres carlos" asked emily looking excited, "hes not here at the mo" replied bex, "oh no" asked emily bemused, "yeah he said he had things to do" "but i told him i was coming back this morning, why didn't he make sure he was here" "oh well, i guess he isn't as bothered as you thought" replied bex casually,
"i'm worried now" said emily looking sad, "oh well, come see come sar, hey" said bex, smiling evily,
so while emily went to get rid of her horse, carlos came out of the toilet, "hey wheres emily" he asked, "just gone to put her horse away" replied bex, "oh right i will go se her" "oh i wouldn't do that, said she wanted to be alone or something" said bex,
"oh well fine" said carlos, going off in a huff,

so when it was time for lunch, everyone headed for the kitchen, joe opened the door casually, "my god!!! what have you done"
he said looking at becca, "i told you, i hate ntl men" she replied, wiping the blood of her face, "oh becca, sometimes you just have to be dificult, don't you!" said robyn, crossly,"sorry its just i'm in a bit of a mood" replied becca, shrugging,
just then emily and viki came in, "my goodness whats happened here?" asked emily, "becca got a bit angry" answered arthur,
"oh dear" said viki, dissaprovingly, "tut tut" "well look, lets not let this little problem spoil our plans, how about we fit the lines ourselves" suggested joe, "hey i thought you were out" said emily looking at carlos, "what are you talking about?" asked carlos,
"and anyway i'm not talking to you" he said, "well fine, i aint talking to you either" replied emily crossly,

so that night everyone went to the pub, and had lots to drink and played some fun darts games before the big final,
and for just one night, all thier problems were forgotten.
so the next day all was quite, joe had let everyone have a lie in, and the morning off from work,
"whats up joe, you look tired and aggrevated" said suz walking in at about 10am, "oh nothing, i'm just thinking about luke,
and where all this will end" replied joe, "i'm sure he'll turn up, and we will find out everything" replied suz, optimisticly,
"i hope so" said joe, supping on a cup of tea, just then carlos came in, "wheres emily i have to talk to her" he said looking serious,
"in her room i think" said emma g, "right" he said in a determined voice, running up the stairs 2 at a time,
"i wonder whats up with them" said suz pondering, "yes i wonder" replied emma g.

so when everyone had got up, and breakfast was being prepared, jo announced her new best seller,
"people i have released a book, oils and teas of the northan hemisphere" "cool" replied james, "can i have a free copy?"
"no you will pay the full price of £27.99, like everyone else" replied jo, "now who will help me to install a printing shop in the basement?" she asked, "i will" answered jeni, "i need a job" "good its settled then" said joe, looking very proud,
"just then emily came bounding down the stairs, "guess what everyone" she screamed, "what " replied everyone at once,
"i'm getting married!!!" she said laughing, "arr thats soo sweet" said debbie, "now now people" she said, "we need to organise this pretty quick" "yes may i be brides maid?" asked ingham, "of course" replied emily, "but calm down please"
"yes emily is right, we need to think about this" said joe sternly, "oh joe, you always have to ruin everything" said alion crossly.

just then bex came strutting in, "wuz up people" she said, "emilys getting married" blurted out robyn, "what" said bex,
"to who?" "who do you think" said jess, "but what about me" she asked, looking at carlos, "bex it was fun, but i was wrong,
and i have decided to forgive emily, dispite what she said" answered carlos, "what did i say" said emily, bemused,
"about not liking me as much as you thought, and all that" " i never said that" said emily astonished, "but bex said..." carlos stuttered, "hey hang on i never said anything" butted in bex, "bex you bitch" shouted emily, "you told me carlos went off when he knew i was coming home" "well... mm.. yes but that wa." "now now everyone calm down" interupted joe,
"outside" said emily, looking at bex bitterly, "you got it missy" said bex, opening the door,
"now stop this, right now" shouted joe, like he meant buisness, everyone shut up, even emily, "we will finish this later" he said,
"for now we have a wedding to organise!!!"

so for the next few days, there was much hustle and bustle, as everyone organised, and phoned friends and ordered dresses,
and all sorts. emilys brother, was coming to play in his band for the reception, with james joining in on lead guitar,
chief, joes sister, was coming down, and even alex (alias rat boy) was coming, much to louises joy.
so after many days of organising, the big day had nearly arrived, so one day, while joe was reading the morning paper,
emily asked him a question, "joe as you know, my dad went to the moon, to start a colony of talking ants,
so i would be very honoured if you were to give me away" "of course i will, i would like that very much" replied joe quite chuffed.

so the big day finally came, becca, ingham and jo, were brides maids, joe was giving emily away, carlos's best mate from portugal,
was best man, reena and alion were catering, sarah was singing, rob was conducting the service, the reception was going to be in the big barn, and the service was being held in the chapel, at the back of the farmhouse, while the night do, was in the pub,
so in the morning, everyone was rushing around, james was refusing to wear a suit, claiming it would look absurd,
the service was supposed to be at 11oclock, and it was already 9.30!! "oh do come on" said alion, "we will be late"
arthur was trying to eat something before he went. "well i don't wanna be hungry in the middle of the service do i" he said,
scoffing down a crumpet, "calm down people" said debbie, "we have plenty of time, if everyone cooperates"
so when all was ready and it was 10.55!! everyone rushed down the flagstone path to the chapel, outside there was rob, smoking a fag, and having a quick pint of tennents, while he still had the chance,

so the service got underway, all went smoothly, other than rob popping out for a kebab, halfway through the vows,
and chief turning up late, after the pub, and sending joe vile text messages during the service,
but it was soon all over, emily and carlos were soo happy, and even bex made up with them, before it was all over,
and debbie cought the bouquet, julia p fell down the steps outside and mingered her ankle, all was good,
and it was off to the barn for drinking, speaches and eating. bex even said a little something and apoligised for causing trouble,
then it was time for the best man speach, "now i have never met any of you before" he began. "so i can say whatever i like and i won't have to take the flack" he scoffed, "right, well where should i begin, first there was the taxi inccident"
so when all the vile and embarresing storys had been told, and carlos had knocked him out, it was time for the band.
emilys brother, (whos name i have forgotten, and whos band name i have forgotten too) took to the stage in style,
and james rocked on his new gibson, made entirely from nozzle plant wood,

so as everyone walked down towards the pub, their in the distance, debbie thought she saw smoke, "isn't that in the direction of the pub" she said, in a worried tone of voice, "oh shit your right" said rob, running off ahead, but coming to a halt after about 4 yards
"i really have to give up smoking, i could of played for Q.P.R" he said puffing, so as they got nearer to the tavern, they could see the whole thing was in flames!!! "my goodness" said jo c, "whats happened, how did it start?" said julia, wondering,
"right come on back home people to get the hoses" shouted joe, running back down the road, "my pub my beutifull pub,
there must be at least 4000 b&hs in there" sobbed rob, "and the beer as well" so joe and several other people,
turned up at the farmhouse, "right i'll open up the back door" said joe loudly over the din of flames licking wood,
"damn it, its locked" said joe, "you won't get in here" said a voice from inside, "everything is locked and bolted"
"luke you bastard" cried out tom, "how could you!" "and" continued luke, "i have a suprise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!................................




NEXT AND FINAL CHAPTER!!!!!!!! AR WELL YOU WILL HAVE TO WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!